welcome and fuck off

listening to : in a lucid dream - satsuki

im feeling so lazy tonight and a little moody..

hmm..



welcome to my new visitor..

it's great to know that someone actually found my blog but i dont really appreciate it so much because some people would criticized what i wrote here. especially when they came here without introducing themselves and start saying shit about me and all my writings.

what's more fuck up is when they're criticizing my feelings. i mean come on, it's people rights to express their feelings. what im saying here is try to understand what people feels and not giving some freaking advice like you're telling that you fucking know everything about me.

i know what im doing. im just saying what my heart feels, im releasing the steam off, get it? i hate it when people saying " how in the hell do you know that she's looking at you? ". it's because i saw it dumbass.

i dont care whether i got her or not, i dont care whether she love me or not, i dont care what she's doing or how she feels about me.

i've been mentioning this all the time and im sick of explaining this again and again to some stupid ignorant bastard who keeps stalking people's life. i know that im not going to get her or have her to be my girlfriend. both of us are totally in a different world, we will never be together. why? both of us have different races and different background. second, she has a boyfriend and they've been together for more than 5 years. i dont want to be called ' a girlfriend stealer '. it's not like im saying that i cant or i can flirt with her anytime that i want. you need to know that i have my own girlfriend and i love her. what? i should dump my girlfriend and go for something that you dont know whether you're gonna get or not? that's stupid.

i know you'll have this in your mind. kimi is a hypocritical person who only thinks about himself. fuck your own shit man! let me tell you something, love is not all about having them nor being with them. it's beautiful to see someone is willing to suffer just to see their beloved one happy.

im not saying that im suffering. im okay with the things going on right now. you people need to know that my love to her and my girlfriend is totally different. my love to her is like me loving the nature. how i enjoy being in the green field and looking at the wonderful blue sky, that's how i love her. i dont need to be with her. to see her is already enough for me okay?
as long as she's happy, im fine.

my love towards my girlfriend is more like the typical love that you or someone else have. "i need her. i want her. i miss her. i love her like she's only woman in this world." that's how much i love my girlfriend.

i dont care whether you understand me or not. that's your fucking business and i dont need people to understand me. no one in this world understand me fully. im a complicated guy. my thoughts are something you bastard cannot read and predict. so stop saying something like you know me. i hate that motherfucker.

i bet you ignorant fools didnt read the description about me on the right side of my blog. that's why you bullshit is still giving me comments and advice about what i wrote here.

so if you hate what i wrote in this blog, you can go to hell and visit some crappy blog that you think you can mess with.

just so you know, this blog is what i called my public 'diary'. i can write whatever i want and say whatever i want in here. im pretending that you guys cant even read what i write here because it's "locked". so if you people gave me some comments that i dont want to see, ill just simply write my response for you.

and my final words for you "mind your own stupid business bullshit, get your own blog and write some of your own shit there. get a fucking life and stop being a busybody"

until then..

my life is dull

*sigh* i dont know why. again i think that my life is so dull. i can't make myself happy even by playing games. it feels that my life is lack of something. i wonder what it is. hmm. oh yeah. dear bloggers. pls do update ur blog please im craving to read some story about u guys. haha i really dont know why. bt come to think of it,it's already july where everyone is busy for their xm. no wonder there is not much update lately.

to those who were having their xm gudluck eh? (:

until then..

Feeling of appreciation

it's been a while since my last post. 5 days to be exact. it's not that i have no ideo on what to post but i have a problem with my credit.. and this case has been solved this morning. thanks mom! i love ya (:

okay,what i want to post is about what i feel about the past few days. i think it's time for me to say goodbye to this blog..







hahaha just kidding.. nahh,ill never ever delete this blog nor changing the url address. what i wanted to say is thanks. this post is specially made by me for my viewers and readers. thank guys for wasting your precious time to read the content in this blog. i know that all my post is nothing but a rubbish of my mouth and still u guys spent ur time by reading it. thank you (:

it's such an honour to know that you guys are visiting and reading my blog. i never thought that you guys are actually reading my post,cus for me,this blog is my heart and why should people intrested in knowing other people's thought and heart? but i really dont care that if no one have ever visited my blog.

also,to my noty,i miss you sweetheart. i know that sometimes u spent ur time by reading my blog,thanks baby. that post with the title hatred,im really sorry about that,i know that post really making u upset dear. im really sorry,but that post was only one of my plan to know whether u really did visit or u didnt visit (: i have no intention to be rude and cursing you like that.. =D

ok,that's all people,ill update more.. soon.. im feeling so sleepy now.. im off to bed,see yaa (:

This is Good Bye

i know im doing the wrong thing. pls dont blame me and dont blame her too. i dont blame god for this. bt this is it,sometimes in life,we have to face everything and fight it. i know i'm a fighter that never give up bt its a fact,a fighter will gonna die someday. no matter how strong they are,they're gona surrender their life in the end. *sigh*

thanks everyone for visiting my blog,unfortunately,this is my last post. im going now.

currently im hearing my last song 'ku ingin kamu by romance' i want to hear this song as soon as im finished this. goodbye everyone. goodbye..

*walks away slowly*