One Lost Piece Of a Jigsaw

listening to : taiyou no todokanai basho - RES

i'm getting tired of this. last year was such a hell of misery and this year, im living with a total hatred. if last year was because of love, this year is all about friends.

i dont think i hate a friend but friends. i hate a lot of friends. some friends i know is bullshitting me at my absence. fuck you!

some friends thought that im a liar. i told them something i SEE and they proved me wrong. fuck that part and not just that, they also sarcastically wrote something about me - saying that i dont accept the truth because i fear humilliation.

what kind of friend is that?

oh yeah, i realised that some group that i used to hang out with. a group that they so-called 'BESTFRIEND FOREVER' didnt really talk much with me. sometimes, they left me behind without saying anything. i feel left out and yet i stay with them but for now, my patience is running thin and im afraid that im going to make a stupid decision ever which is abandoning them.

cool eh?

im waiting for the perfect time to move and get away from them. i know im just a stranger and im not a part of the family. guess what? this stupid family once rejected a friend that is willing to join them. fuck that!

*sigh*

i simply dont understand the meaning of friends in this new enviroment i live within this 3 years. it seriously changed a lot and a total different than the one i had in mind.

thanks to god, i still have a few good buddy. even if i dont have one, it's still okay for me as im the person who enjoy solitude the most.

until then..