Failure -.-'

Hey

Just a brief update here (:

Okay,

I did told you guys that I quit smoking right? well, it's a failure. I tried my best to quit but I can't. Well, the good thing is I'm not a heavy one but a passive one (: I'm still trying to quit. It has been 3 days since the day I announced that I quit smoking now. One smoke per day, that's my limit. Hope I can get rid of it soon (:

Wish me luck! ^_^

Until then..

Cancer Stick

venue : dining hall of ptek
music : joukei no kanata - danger gang

i've been wanting to do this since the second day i started sucking those poisonous gas. flicking through every page of my memories, i realised why did i start playing with those cancer stick again. it's all because of those two stupid 'kibyan' girls.

*sigh*

i had enough telling some worthless story about them. not only they're worthless, they're also wasting my time. ever since that day, i swear to sky to try to avoid those stupid 'kibyan' people. to me, their presence can only bring misery. it's better for me to off alone rather than being with them.

okay, enough talk. the point i want to make here is that i started smoking due to the stressful situation because that stupid 'kibyan' girl reminded me of my stupid ex! another point is i quit playing with those stick after having my last one last midnight. this is because of the wish i made before.

"i'll only quit if i have a girlfriend"

i maybe say that but actually i wish for it. now, it's been nearly 3 weeks since the first time i proposed my farhana. after 3 weeks, i got the heart to move on and do what i said.

i, kimi kiyoshi hereby announced that i quit smoking! (: it's not permanent though. no promises x(

until then..

Old Grudge

Holla ..

Hey, I miss posting something in this blog. Anyway, it's just a brief update. Maybe haha!

Yesterday, I met one of my enemy at PTEK while I was smoking at my usual place where smokers usually gathers. He's my old enemy actually. Well, it's all because of noty. You guys know how she is right? She loves to have more than one relationship at a time. Thank god she realised now that it's wrong to do something like that.

Okay back to my story, I dont think I want to mention his name here but yeah, he asked my name first then he told me that maybe I know him. Honestly I didnt even recognize his face nor his voice until he mentioned noty's name. After he introduced me himself, he went off.

The point I want to make here is that it feels good to know that old grudge is forgotten now. I remember how both of us used to fight because of her. I know it's stupid but yeah, that shows how immature we were before. I hope there's no sense of hatred any more and we would able to become friends instead of enemies.

Okay, that's all

Until then..

Anything That You Guys Missed About Me .. (:

Hey..

It's been a while now since my last post. I know it's must be disappointing for those who kept on checking my page for an update although I think I don't have one. Hehs! Honestly, I kept on checking my blog every single time I open my laptop, it's just I'm too lazy to write anything.

Okay, here you go my dear viewers (:

First thing I wanna share with you guys is the fact that I'm not a loner anymore. YEAY! hehe. I proposed one girl last week on 29th March. The sweet thing was I proposed her during her birthday which I thought it was supposed to be her greatest present. Maybe ;p hehe I just love to create some special moment.

Second news is I discovered some new v-kei band for me to follow which is D and El Ethic Legist xD Their music is really good, I mean it! ;D

Third thing is a news about my feelings. All you guys know how much I love that Korean girl in my school right? I tried to forget her since I have my own girlfriend to think about but it seems that the more I try to forget her the more I fall in love with her. I just can't get her out from my mind. Aki told me that it's normal for guys to feel that, there's nothing wrong with it and I agreed with him but seriously I feel really guilty for my baby. I don't think that it's fair for her. It's like I'm betraying her love. That's what I think actually. Okay, stop about this. I don't want to deal with this anymore. I think it's the best if I just go with the flow. (:

Fourth news : hmm, okay. Maybe most of my friends realised that I'm smoking those cancer sticks already. I just hope they don't look me in a different way than before. I know it's bad for health but I cant stop it anymore. I think I already addicted to it but I know sometime in this year, I'll be stopping sucking those poisonous gas.

Last news is about my studies. AS'level is near now. It'll start somewhere around May. I don't really need to be specific here. Not to forget about O'lvl too, I'm going to have my 4th time sitting for English O'lvl. It's not that my English skill is not very good, I'm just trying to upgrade my English grade from C to A. I really put too much hope on this (Amin!) Okay, back to my studies, I told ya that my AS'level examination is coming right? The worst thing is I haven't prepared anything for it even for my second MPR. I'm such a lazy ass *sigh* I'll try to change but not that fast. I'll be changing gradually without anyone notices it (:

Okay guys, that's all I think you need to know about me for now.. I'll try to update more okay? No promises about it. Wish me a good luck for my coming exams and not to forget my love life (: Take care fellas, I Love You

Hana-Kimi <3

Until then...

Anger of Sadness

*sigh*

yesterday was such a bad day. i'd been nervous for the whole morning because of my geo test. not only that, there's one other thing that stressed me out yesterday. it's my GP. ms. aida told me that my test was marked as absent. which means that i get nothing over hundred. the passing mark for overall was 200 and i havent achieved the requirements yet. my heart cried for the whole day. it was hard for me to believe that ill be demoted to lower 6.. but that's the truth. i cant deny it. it's the fact that i have to faced for the whole year.

hehs, another year of being a repeater eh? *sigh* im thinking of moving somewhere else where not even one soul know or recognise my name.. but it's just too impossible..

one thing i realised after the geo test yesterday, friend is an enemy for your goal.. bestfriend is a song that will soothe your heart.. best bestfriend is your shadow that feel your pain and grief along with ya..

i'll hate the one who's being so not helpful yesterday.. because you cause me misery for the whole season!

until then

-.-'

*growl*

i'm hungraaaaaaaaayyyyyyy !!! -.-'

fourteen :/

current music : watch me bleed - scary kids scaring kids

it feels so cold tonight. thank god it doesnt rain tonight. so im able to enjoy the little things a bit. i could only see the sparkling stars tonight but not the moon ): tough luck i guess..

*sigh*

it's fourteen today, valentine's day and chinese new year. also a memorial day for sauzan or notykitz. i remember how special was this day used to be. *laughs* i must be foolish that time to think that relationship is going to be forever. well, that time i was too naive in all this things, i admit it but somehow it amazes me that this heart of mine can never stop thinking about the days where she and i used to have.. all the sad times, happy times and all the problematic situation.

come to think of it, it's been a year now since i broke my connection with her. i really miss her so much although i know i have to step out from this chaotic past. it's just i cant help myself when my mind rolled back thinking all the memories i had with her. to be honest, the only person i want in this world is her. that "noty" insolent girl.

but it's all over now.. the beautiful moment only last for a year and four months..

*sigh*

until then..